Man’s Autistic Daughter Believes She is Transgender, and Her Public School Blocked His Efforts to Stop Her

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In 2016, parents of a 14-year old girl on the autism spectrum was influenced by another student who was transgender and announced that she, too, was a boy. The school faculty and staff of the autistic child called her by a new name and used male pronouns, all without the parents’ knowledge. When the parents found out and objected, school officials claimed that they had to follow the law. However, there is no such law, only a 2016 letter from the Obama administration that said schools need to officially affirm transgender students. Three months later, a federal judge in Texas blocked the guidelines from being enforced. In February, 2017, the Trump administration rescinded the Obama-era guidelines, but the school still insists it must follow the law. Many parents are afraid to speak out because they will be called transphobic bigots. When a minor turns 18, life-altering, testosterone injections are just one “informed consent form” away and easily can be obtained through Planned Parenthood clinics. -GEG

In April 2016, my then 14-year-old daughter became convinced that she was my son. In my attempt to help her, her public school undermined me every step of the way.

Throughout my daughter’s childhood, there were no signs that she wanted to be a boy. She loved stuffed animals, Pocahontas and wearing colorful bathing suits. I can’t recall a single interest that seemed unusually masculine, or any evidence that she was uncomfortable as a girl.

The only difficulty she had was forming and maintaining friendships. We later learned why: She was on the autism spectrum. She was very functional and did well in school, helped by her Individualized Education Program (IEP), a common practice for public school students who need special education.

At her high school, my daughter was approached by a girl who had recently come out at school as transgender. Shortly after meeting her, my daughter declared that she, too, was a boy trapped in a girl’s body and picked out a new masculine name.

Our school kept parents in the dark

She first came out as transgender to her school, and when she announced that she was a boy, the faculty and staff — who had full knowledge of her mental health challenges — affirmed her. Without telling me or my wife, they referred to her by her new name. They treated my daughter as if she were a boy, using male pronouns and giving her access to a gender neutral restroom.

When her mother and I first found out, our feelings of helplessness and astonishment made it difficult to get through each day. But I feel my daughter is a victim more than anything else.

In an IEP meeting just after she told us about being a boy, I told the school that our wishes are to call her by her legal name at all times. The social worker present at the meeting stated that we have that right to make that request, so I assumed school staff would follow our directive. I followed up that meeting with an email, but later learned that my request was ignored and school staff continued to refer to her by the male name.


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